Rev. Dr. Mike Wooton

Did you know that any time a friend makes you laugh, they are helping you? The family member that you silently watched a movie with last weekend came to your aid. How? They have become a part of your support system. What is a support system? It is the people you connect with that keep you strong emotionally and mentally. 

Thinking about who is in your support system is important. First, it makes you grateful for the people in your life. Second, the supportive people in your life can unlock your potential. Third, it makes you reflect on your contributions to others. Having supportive people in your life matters.

Are you feeling stuck right now? Perhaps you’re missing one of the seven types of people below. 

1. The Non-Judgmental Person 

This is the “nod their head a go along with whatever-you-said” person in your life. The non-judgmental person does not evaluate you or your decision-making. They don’t blink at your wrong actions or thoughts. When you get into a bad relationship, they just listen. You get into another bad relationship for the same reason; they listen some more. The non-judgmental person listens to you, nods their head, and goes along with whatever you say.  

The positive of having a non-judgmental person in your life is you can freely talk without consequence. You don’t have to think through how to phrase your words and there is no worrying about stepping on their toes. They don’t push back and the relationship will be there no matter what. There is a lot of support that non-judgmental people bring us. 

2. The Person Who Gives You Difficult Advice

This is the person who just “tells you how it is.” How do you identify this type of person? The good news is you don’t have to because they identify themselves. I gained about 12 lbs. over the holiday season. The people who “tell you how it is” are crawling out of the woodwork. They don’t sugarcoat much; if anything at all. 

These straight shooters are everywhere, but we don’t like hearing much from them because they bring us down a peg or two. Why do we need a person like this in our lives? They push against the lies we tell ourselves. You need to be open to someone that can give you difficult advice. They are the people who keep us grounded and connected to our true identity.  

3. The Person That You Can Just Be Around 

This is the person you feel comfortable “just being you.” It’s the person you can be silent around and don’t feel a need to keep a conversation going. You easily could fall asleep with the person in the room without thinking about it. It’s also the person who puts up with you. Someone puts up with you. Someone puts up with me. We all need those people, who can roll their eyes at our buffoonery and move on. 

4. The Person Who Sees Only The Good In You

This is the person who sees you with rose-colored glasses. For this person, when you walk in the room all that comes to mind is your goodness, gifts, and potential. Optimism abounds because this person believes in you. This person is one of the most important people in your support system because they help bring to mind your best self. 

This person may get on your nerves a little bit because there are days, when you may not want to remember the good in yourself. Their mere presence will keep calling it out; that can be annoying on rough days. Yet, they are paramount people because they bring us back to the best parts of us. We need the person who only see the good in us, in our support system. 

5. The Person You Go With “Out and About” 

This is your “plus-one” person. This person is always good to have by your side in public and at social gatherings. This person isn’t necessarily great at socializing, they just make you feel comfortable and help you enjoy being out and about. It’s the person you invite to go shopping with, go to the gym, a movie, a concert, a church event, etc. Their presence with you becomes a supportive factor in your life.  

6. The Talk About Your “Passions With Person”

You need a passionate person in your life. Someone who shares the same passion as you is beneficial. One reason you need to find a person to share your passions with is for your spouse’s sanity. I’ve shared several things over the years I’m passionate about that my wife listens to ad nauseaum. Truth be told, she has somewhere around zero interest in most of those passions.

If your spouse isn’t passionate about what you’re passionate about, you are going to drive him/her crazy. On the other hand, you’ll grow crazy if you can’t share your passion with someone who “gets it.” Find someone to talk about your passions with, your spouse will thank you for it. 

7. The “Have Fun With” Person  

This is the barrel-of-laughs person in your life. Everything is a joke or can be made into a joke for this person. We all need a fun person in our lives. The fun person will help relieve stress and give you a break from life’s responsibilities. We all need a person with whom we can have fun.

There is not one person on earth that can be all of these things to you. That is why we all need a support system. This week, think about who you are getting your support from. Thank God for them. Then takes some time to figure out what type of person you are missing. That person’s presence in your life may exactly be what you’ve been needing.